Thanks to cinematic fantasy and Ryan Seacrest, your New Year's Eve expectations have never been more unrealistic.
Every year, you trick yourself into thinking this will finally be the evening that you attend a party that's straight out of The Great Gatsby, only to be disappointed when you end up on the couch, hanging out with your cat. (But seriously, is that really the worst evening you could imagine?)
See also: 14 Solutions to Your New Year's Midnight Kiss
Never fear, because there are plenty of other ways to ring in the new year by celebrating or just letting yourself down with unfulfilling plans.
You forgot to make plans ahead of time, or were too busy, so you manage to pull together a hodge-podge of people who would never hang out together on any other occasion if they hadn't forgotten to make plans too.
Who needs a bunch of people spilling beer and taking all the spots on your couch when you could have a night in with your dog? You're comfortable and confident in your solitude.
You paid a shameful amount to experience the New Year's Eve party that only exists in movies. It's just too bad that the open bar made you unable to remember any of it.
You've been camping out in the middle of Times Square since Friday. You also have no concept of personal space, and are probably wearing a diaper right now.
They don't sell fireworks anywhere within 50 miles of you, which is exactly why you made a pitstop on the way home from the beach last summer. Laws be damned, you're going to light something on fire tonight.
Sometimes, all it takes is a bucket of Bud Light Limes and your best friend to make a memorable New Year's Eve.
Sigh. Another New Year's Eve washing down queso (sans the chips) with an entire bottle of Andre, sobbing to just that one clip in When Harry Met Sally. On the bright side, you'll beat everyone to hangover brunch tomorrow morning because you'll fall asleep at precisely 12:30 a.m.
Now that you have a designated person to kiss when the ball drops, the rest of the evening doesn't really matter. Why spend the evening fighting for a cab or squeezing into circulation-cutting tights when you could just sit on the couch in your underwear and make fun of Ryan Seacrest?
That is, of course, you actually are Ryan Seacrest. If that's the case, then you really shouldn't even be reading this, because aren't you supposed to be on top of a ball right now or something?
This whimsical party with the overflowing champagne fountain basically only exists in your dreams or Target commercials, unless you bought your way into this fantasy land. (See: Club) If you happen to find yourself at such a mystical place, do everything in your power to keep those friends for the rest of your life.
Maybe you had a little too much champagne too early. Perhaps you worked all day, and haven't gotten over the post-holiday grind. It's also possible that you've totally just given up, in general.
You might knock the low-key house party with a handful of your closest friends. But the truth is, it's probably the least stressful, most underrated New Year's Eve you've ever had.
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